Ups and Downs

Ups and Downs

Firstly I must apologise for not updating sooner but as you can see from the title it’s been a bit of an unpredictable time recently. 


Week 3 went really well and I was gaining in strength and stamina.  But then just before and over Easter I was hit by anxiety.  I have never suffered with this before and I was feeling awful.  I didn’t want to go out much unless I was with people, I felt very nervous, shaking, palpitations, the works.  I tried to do the week shop and the whole time I was in the supermarket I felt as though I was on the verge of a panic attack.
I already had to go to the GP to arrange for my monthly blood tests to be done so I arranged for an appointment to discuss this too.  It was decided that it was probably due to the massive dose of steroids I had with the Lemtrada which were still in my system.  Basically I just had to get on with it and try to find ways of dealing with it.  But I was signed off work until the middle of May to let me try and sort myself out.
After chatting with Daryl we decided that I should start trying to include my old daily dog walk routine into my week as this used to help me arrange my days mentally.  So once the kids were back at school I managed to do the school run (walk) and then take the dogs out to the woods.  I was a bit slower than before but it was great!  I have always loved my woodland dog walks as they really help to ground me and it gives me time to let my mind just wander and let off steam.  I have always joked that if I had done a mind map of my thoughts during a dog walk it really would be so random.  Then again that afternoon I also managed the school walk back home too so a really good day!  I won’t hide it I was shattered and could not manage a dog walk the next day that’s for sure.  This fatigue really has been the hardest to deal with as my mind says do this, do that, tidy this but my body just will not cooperate.  
So I had my plan to deal with my mental health and physical health and was starting to feel positive again.  THEN on Sunday I woke in the worst pain I’ve known since labour!  I was literally crying in pain and discomfort in my flank and could not get comfortable anywhere.  The children were really worried bless them and Chloe even went and got my old teddy bear to help me feel better!!!!  I had taken Paracetamol and that didn't touch it so I resorted to 500mg Naproxen.  After an hour and some breakfast they still were not really touching the pain so I called 111.  I had the triage exactly as expected (the advantage of knowing the NHS Pathways triage inside out!) and had a GP callback arranged for me within 2 hours.  Knowing they were busy I knew it could be any time.  So continued wandering around the house and getting dressed.  Well the GP called within half an hour and arranged for me to be seen at the local Out of Hours Hub.  We popped along and no one else was waiting so a quick urine test and went straight in to be seen.  By this time the Naproxen were kicking in and I was feeling a bit more comfortable.  I was given a thorough check and it was decided that I probably had a kidney infection and given Co-Amoxiclav (penicillin).    
So I have been hit hard by this infection and back to feeling exhausted after just the morning rush of getting ready and getting to school.  And yes my mental health had gone down a little as I have put on a little weight since being less active and not being able to do quite as much as my mind wants to.  Therefore I need a plan to get me back up and running again!!!!
I am back to eating healthier (and this does include BACON) now all the Easter Eggs have gone and drinking more fluids and much less alcohol!  We have had 2 weekends of having a few drinks which was great but need to curb it to a) help my kidney infection and b) so I can prepare for Daryl’s pending big birthday celebrations!!!!  But how to sort out my physical and mental health?  It occurred to me the other day that I need to get back into my Somatics.  I have let this go recently but when I was doing this fairly regularly it was helping my body but also my mental health massively too!  For those who don't know this is a series of very gently exercises to help your body move better and more effectively.  When done regularly you can regain movement that has been lost over time and also relieve chronic pains that have been hindering you.  
My plan then is to start doing Somatics a few times a week to start with and to fit in a dog walk at least once a week along with eating and drinking better this week.  Then next week I will try to build this up a bit more and see if I can get myself back up to functioning on all 4 cylinders again!  Of course it goes without saying that I will still be crocheting LOTS as this is a brilliant new found craft that I just can’t put down!

 

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